"I'll miss you, Mom"

I must admit I have been somewhat discouraged and a little depressed the past day or two. Phil got laid off from his job of six hours a week at a fitness center and Clark was in the hospital for two days while Paul and I were in Mesoamerica. He wanted to go with us and would tell me numerous times a day “I’ll miss you, Mom.” We would talk about who would be here to take good care of him (his sister and two brothers who live about two miles from us). I even marked the calendar so he would know exactly how many days left until we returned. I realized he wouldn’t really understand when he saw my hand-written number on a date but I knew Cherlyn could at least say “See, they will be home in ten, five or three days.”

We’ll get to work next week on trying to find another job for Phil. Actually, we’ll work through DVR (Division of Vocational Rehabilitation). I always start off optimistic. Phil is energetic, dependable and personable. There must be some job, somewhere, in a ten-mile radius from our house. He worked at Deseret Industries for six years but that is no longer an option since their philosophy is “Deseret Industries is not a landing place; it is a place of training and transition.”

Clark is now doing well after his two days in the hospital from complications from seizures. It is probably a good thing that we could not be reached in Guatemala since there was nothing we could have done (except worry!!!). Our five other kids rallied and stayed with Clark 24 hours a day. As soon as we arrived home we got all the details. I heard the words they were saying but it took a couple of days to digest. My appreciation for them grew as I thought about the sacrifices they made as they took good care of their brother.

Yesterday I took a friend to the hospital for a test to find out if her cancer has spread further. She is about 60 and has been widowed for ten years. She has two children. She is estranged from one and the other, who lives in another state, is angry and in denial concerning her cancer which is very painful. Oh, that puts things a little more clearly in perspective. I don’t have much to be discouraged or depressed about.